Vote Vickie in 2012

Today is going to suck. Truly and deeply. I forgot to turn my alarm clock off, being Saturday and all, so I get woke the eff up at 6 15 am. On. A. Saturday.

Ok, you say, that's not so bad. Exactly 22 minutes after said alarm goes off, I experienced an intense cramp. In my leg. Fuckity fuck a charlie horse. I haven't had a charlie horse in prolly 15 years. So my half awake, kinda stumblin like I'm drunk ass is pacing the bedroom trying to work out the kink in my lower limb. And it works. For all of 35 seconds. The instant I laid my head on the pillow, it hits again. AGAIN. I fling the covers off and again start pacing around the bedroom.

Again you say, that's still not so bad. Whatever. Loki has been watching me the whole time, as a matter of fact, when the alarm went off at 6 15 he came into the bedroom, curled up at the bottom of the bed, and waited for me to get up and into the shower. This way he can gank the warm spot I leave behind before the other dog gets it. ANYWHO, Loki is watching me walk back and forth around the bed, into the bathroom, and back around the bed trying to ease my screaming muscle ok? Well little dog must think I'm actually getting up because he goes and gets his "little buddy" and drops it on the bed. He wants to play fetch. At 6 51 am. On a Saturday.

My day is going to suck.

I decided to get up. Like always, I put on CNN Headline news while I go about my morning. Getting dressed, brushing my hair and teeth, things of that nature, and I listen to whats going on in the world. CNN doesn't have the biased, twisted standpoints like Fox News, and CNN doesn't have nearly as much silly stories as your local morning TV news shows have.

I know, get the point already.

CNN was talking about the presidential candidates (go fig), and how there are still like 35% of the population that says they are undecided. I'm one of them. Well kinda sorta but not really. I want to vote for myself (or someone like me). Really.

John McCain will not get my vote. Even if my choice was between him and a goat. And I hate goats. I do not agree with his choice for a VP, I do not like his stance on anything, and yes I truly believe that if he was elected, it would be no diff'rent than having W for another term. I think Palin is not right for the job but not because she is inexperienced. I think because she was thrust into this position by a party that is flailing. Miserably.

Barak Obama is more to my liking, but not really. In his speeches, I feel like he is a car salesman, and he should have one of those inflatable arm-flailing tube men behind him while he is screaming "Push it in, tow it in or drag it in. Ill give you 4000.00 for your trade no matter what!! Get down here before 6 and Ill get you in a new car TODAY". Sure he is charming, elegant, well spoken and well mannered, but..maybe just a little TOO much so.

Vickie would be perfect.

I am like everyone else. I don't pretend to be someone I'm not, and I sure as shit don't claim my moral character is better than anyone elses.

I have tried marijuana. I have slept with my landlord to pay the rent (and the computer repair guy too) and I'm not embarrassed to say so. I have lied. I have stolen. I had premarital sex, kinky in the alley kinda sex at that, I have used sex as a tool to manipulate. I have drank until I puked, driven under suspension, put the gas bill in the electric bill envelope and vice versa to get a few more days to pay before they cut me off. I have started fights for no reason other than I was pissed off about something I couldn't control and wanted to lash out. I have verbally abused cashiers and customer service reps. I have walked out of the grocery store, forgot to pay for the soda on the bottom of my cart, and NOT gone back in to pay for it. I am not ashamed. I have been divorced, filed bankruptcy and been in foreclosure. My credit rating is in the low 600's, I haven't paid a credit card bill in months, I don't own a car and I currently cohabitate with someone who is not my husband.

The person running against me would have a whole shitload of ammo for a negative campaign. And I guess that I would deserve it. The media would have a field day with all the skeletons they would pull outta my closets and ya know what? That's ok too. Most of that stuff I did years ago and have learned from my mistakes. Seriously, isnt that what life is about anyway?

That being said, why vote for me eh?

I would pull the military out of the middle east. Right now. And take the oil with me. Lets say we are... pirates. Pirate A "invades" your ship. He takes what he wants and leaves. A pirate doesn't invade any ship unless 1) he knows he can win and 2) he gets something for his trouble ie; OIL. America is a pirate. We have proved our point, now take what we want and LEAVE. They don't want us there. Why fight for a country that hates us? Pirates don't care about bragging rights. "Oh we beat Iraq everyone. Go Team." The American people don't care about bragging rights. We want oil so this wont happen again. Remember the 70's?

Abortion is a choice. Plain and simple. If you don't want to have one, great. But don't tell me I cant. Fuck you. I deal with the consequences. Not you. And it should be covered by insurance.

And speaking of health care. It should be for everyone. Period. And that's all I got to say about that.

If an elected official does not show up for senate debates, or committee meetings or whatever else said elected official is supposed to do, he/she should be fired. They can have 80 hours vacation, 40 sick and 40 personal like most normal jobs. There is a campaign ad going around my community that said a certain elected official has not been to a committee meeting in 2 years. 2 fuckin years. And the one meeting he went to, it was to give himself a raise. A nine THOUSAND dollar raise. What would happen if you didn't go to work for 2 years? Hmmm?

I would not spend 60 million dollars to campaign for a job that only pays 400,000 a year. I would take said 60 million and set up a fund for those people who are in foreclosure right now. Bail out the families that are losing their homes.

Welfare is a helping hand, not a lifestyle. My county DHS not only helps with food and cash, but new appliances, gasoline cards, pay for college and/or job training, fix your furnace, weatherize your home, pay your rent, and will not charge you for day care. There are some communities that will give you a new house. A NEW HOUSE. With little or no interest. All because someone didn't know how to use a condom. No wonder welfare is a hard cycle to break. I say give MORE to the parents who are working, help those that are helping themselves.


The president is a leader, not God. I dont expect my president to know everything about everything. Thats what cabinet members are for. Get the right people in place to fix the problems. Is that so hard?

If I was president, that is exactly what I would do.