Thursday, October 2, 2008

Oh if I was a drinker..

Today work sucked. Busy as all hell.. a little cold weather and the general public goes freakin' crazy!! I swear, if I hear just one more time "Its supposed to be gittin cold" I am gonna suplex someone off the top rope!!

I don't know if any of yous have seen the show Dexter? Dexter is a blood spatter analyst, working for the Miami police department, respected on the force, and has a great girlfriend. Dexter is also a serial killer. Torture them, chop them up, then dump the pieces in the water type of killer. Whats cool is he only kills bad guys. Criminals. I suppose Ma and Pa Kettle have issues with violence, but I kind of cheer him on. He is a modern day Robin Hood, a vigilante taking revenge on the evils of society. And so what if he cuts em up? I say have at it. The people he goes after are killers, drug dealers, rapists, who would do nothing but suck the resources out of the system I pay for. Let him. It satisfies his need to kill, it cleanses the planet of these human diseases and it costs me NOTHING... oh again, I digress... The show is a series on Showtime, but has since been picked up by the mainstream tv audience. I haven't watched this on regular tv (meaning non-cable) because I know they are going to have to edit the snot out of it.

At the end of the episode I watched last night, a group of cops went to a bar. Now I haven't been to a bar in years. Literally. Say... 15 years...and I wouldn't even have an inkling on what to order. Traditionally I have been a Jack kinda gal... I used to like my liquor quick, hot and to the point. Burn on the way down, cloud my brain and allow me to do stupid things, like let an epileptic with no license drive my car with me puking in the backseat... oh those were the days.

Nowadays I am a bit more mellow, enjoying the occasional margarita at the cliche Mexican restaurant, or a glass of red wine at the uber-cliche Italian restaurant whose name rhymes with Smolive Barden. I think I would prefer more cocktails, or even the fancy shot drinks. Remember the fuzzy navel or sex on the beach? I found some much more interesting ones and while the names were extremely creative, I'm not so sure on the flavor.

Open Wound

a dash of tabasco

Purple Jesus

vodka with grape kool-aid

Retards Blend

the recipe doesnt list everything, just vodka, whiskey, and tequila.. I guess your a retard if you drink it


1 part Raspberry Schnapps
1 part Grenadine
1 part Baileys

add baileys last, when it curdles, slam it

Mind Eraser
Equals parts Kaluha and Vodka with a shot of soda

Nutty Irishman

Frangelico, Whiskey and Baileys
equal parts

Evil Smurf

4 cups vodka
2 cups blue raspberry slushie mix
1 20 container blue gatorade
mix until its a slushy

Redheaded Sluts
cranberry juice, jager and peach schnapps

Pink Panty Dropper
strawberry vokda, pink grapefruit juice and club soda
Snot Rocket

Apple brandy
sour apple pucker
lime vodka

Rubber Duckie

vodka, orange juice and a splash of sprite
Rusty scrotum
2 parts tequila, one part lime juice

Milk Dud
dark chocolate Godiva and caramel vodka
You got any good ones?

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